Compassion asks us to go where it hurts, to enter into the places of pain, to share in brokenness, fear, confusion, and anguish. —Henry Nouwen
Kairos Outside Central Ohio (KOCO) is a ministry committed to provide community for any woman who has an incarcerated loved one. These women are the mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, family and friends who live among us in our neighborhoods, churches, workplaces and yet often feel unwelcome, unwanted and isolated.
In a study conducted by Jama Network Open, please note the following findings:
Having a family member incarcerated can damage economic stability of already financially tenuous families, who are then at greater risk of criminal legal system involvement. Individuals with family members who are incarcerated are more likely to have reduced social support owing to community stigma attached to incarceration. The reduced social support spans generations, with children and grandparents experiencing stigmatization and financial consequences and grandparents experiencing caregiver burden. In addition to outcomes in family social dynamics, incarceration is associated with negative long-term health consequences for family members. …data suggests that incarceration of a family member is associated with an impact on broader well-being, defined as a holistic condition encompassing physical health, as well as emotional, social and spiritual components.
Kairos Outside is a 2 ½ day Christian Weekend designed to demonstrate God’s grace and love in a safe environment and to offer unconditional love and acceptance for women who have been impacted by the incarceration of a loved one. I was a co-spiritual director on KOCO Weekend #3, held last May. One of the activities of the weekend involves the guests showing a picture of their loved one and telling their new community something about them. I happened to know the circumstances of one of the incarcerated persons and his offenses were such that his freedom from incarceration is unlikely. His two daughters were mere children when he went to prison, and now in their early thirties, they stood up together and held his picture tenderly and looked at it with great joy as they spoke with love of their Dad and told us what a good Dad he is to them. You see, through the years they just see him as “Dad”, not through the lens of society. As small children, they had no part in his offenses, yet as grown women they are the innocent bystanders judged guilty by association, possibly faulted for loving their Dad. In the safety of Kairos Outside, they felt free to speak their hearts in a way they likely don’t in the community at large.
The Kairos Outside Central Ohio Weekend #4 will be May 15 -17, 2026, being held at the Episcopal Procter Center in London, Ohio for the first time. This retreat center will bring the guests into the sanctity of a sacred presence much like the Erie Benedictine Community and for that I am grateful. Both are places I can call home, and what is more loving than to invite guests into your home, isn’t that the Benedictine way, radical hospitality? “Are we our Sisters’ Keepers?” Not too long ago we heard a homily about the Good Shepherd, and then Jesus said, “go and do likewise.” Lest we forget, these are women who are hurt, live in places of pain, suffer brokenness, fear and anguish. Never doubt that your compassion can’t make a difference, it is the compassion of sisters looking out for sisters that can make all the difference in the world. I am asking for your support in the way of prayers for the entire Kairos Outside Central Ohio to continue to grow into a strong and viable community.
Agape words of encouragement, prayer support, and artwork for KOCO Weekend #4 may be sent to:
Kairos Outside Central Ohio
P.O. Box 432
Amherst, OH 44001
Submitted by:
Jackie Burns, Oblate, retired Deacon, still actively doing God’s bidding as it seems that retirement is not in God’s vocabulary. I hope my mansion in the sky has a recliner chair!
Sources cited:
JAMA Network Open. 2021;4(5):e2111821.doi:10.1001/jamanetworkopen.2021.11821
Kairos Outside Central Ohio, Ministry under the umbrella of kairosohio.org
